I know when some mothers are pregnant with their second child they often think "how can I love this child as much as I love the one I already have?" I never thought that. I figured if I have this much love for my first child than certainly I will have the same amount for the next, and the next after that. I was right. Love can be limitless. It still is. This child, this little boy with his big brown eyes, coarse hair, ready smile, and smooth brown skin has captured my heart like I can't explain. I have as much joy for him as I have for my Luca. I have as much worry for him as I have for my Teagan. I have as much pride for him as I have for my Henley. Rowan is beautiful and wonderful and has so much potential. I can't wait to show him off. I can't wait to watch him grow, to see what kind of boy he is going to be. I don't know anything about him. Will he be short or tall, athletic, musical, smart, or not so smart. Will he laugh a lot or will he be serious? I don't know. I feel excitement at his unknown potential and also sadness. I can give him nothing about his past, his parents. He is going into this life blind yet he will go forward with love. I can pray him forward and pray for his security. I am his mother and he is my son. I love him more than words can say. God loves him more than I do and God knows him inside out, where he came from and where he is going. Thank God for God.
"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord. Plans to prosper you, not to harm you. Plans to give you a hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11
Saturday, January 24, 2009
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
We're Back!
First, I have to say sorry I didn't blog while in Ethiopia. The internet connection was so slow I couldn't even get on to my blog. I was able to check email and email my girls but that was about it. The Bole Rock Hotel, though nice and comfortable, was definitely not an American hotel.
Since I wasn't able to write while there I won't be able to recreate our entire trip. I think instead I'll just recall some points that stick out in my mind.
The altitude. I'm a pretty fit person but by the time I climbed three flights of stairs in the hotel my heart felt like it was going to jump out of my chest. Maybe by the last day I was starting to get used to it but the climb still made me breathe hard and my heart pound.
The diesel fumes. Apparently Ethiopia had no emissions regulations and all the cars are diesel and old and the fumes while sitting in traffic were overpowering. They also have very few traffic lights and no seat belt laws. Ethiopian drivers are very proficient at using their horns but not in a rude way. They beep to let you know they aren't stopping so you'd better get out of the way.
The beggars. They weren't necessarily everywhere but they were a lot of places. Begging is illegal in Ethiopia though that didn't stop most people. As we were driving down a busy street (and they were all busy) a boy, about eight to ten years old, was running next to our car against traffic with his hand out. Right before he was about to get smacked by a wing mirror of a passing truck an old man reached out with two hands and grabbed this boy. Then he laid into him apparently telling him off for begging. It's not only illegal but also degrading.
Hope's Place. Hope's Place is the orphanage where Kidus (Rowan) was at. I cried the first time I stepped over the threshold and saw all these beautiful brown faces so eager to be held. I cried when I climbed the steps to the baby room and saw my son for the first time. I recognized him right away. He was being spoon-fed runny rice cereal from a cup. That's my son. He's beautiful and he's mine. My boy. My boy.
Love. Some people question whether they are going to love their adopted child as much as they love their biological children. I'll be honest. I did. I had no idea what to expect but it was love at first sight. Love with a capital L. It was so easy to say "I love you" to him, to snuggle him, to kiss him. I was amazed at the love that poured out of my heart for this little 12-pound baby that I had just set eyes upon. It was overwhelming and wonderful.
Injera. Injera is the main bread they eat in Ethiopia. It is made of Teff flour and is flat and spongy and often sour. They lay a large round piece of injera on your plate and then spoon bits of stew or lentils on top. Ethiopians don't use silverware. Instead they break off a bit of injera and sop it up. I found it delicious and messy. After you eat and before, in fact, someone brings a bowl and pitcher around so you can rinse your hands. Just think, no silverware to wash.
A mother and her two kids. Of all the people I saw in Ethiopia these three stick in my mind. A mother sat on the side of the road with a baby on one leg and what looked like a three-year-old on the other. They just sat there on the sidewalk of this busy road. The fumes were awful and I just thought this is not what a three-year-old should be doing. She should be in preschool or playing with barbies or watching Seseme Street. She probably hadn't eaten anything that day I saw her, nothing that is but diesel fumes. The heartbreak this mother must feel being able to give her children nothing but her lap. Is that good enough?
Ethiopian Christmas. We were so fortunate to be in Ethiopia for their Christmas which they celebrate on January 7. It is not like our Christmas though. It is not commercialized and it is not extended beyond the day. Everyone was back at work or school the next day. Business as usual. Together with the two other Hope families we traveled with we bought a live sheep for the orphanage to have for Christmas. They killed it and we ate sheep and injera, played games, and danced. It was so neat to be able to celebrate Christmas at the orphanage. I don't have the words to explain it. There was so much joy and happiness and absolutely no commercialization. It was how Christmas should be. Plus, it had been Henley's prayer that we would have Rowan for Christmas. We did. God answered her prayer.
Sarsina and her brother Thomas. Sarsina is a 14-year-old girl who is going to be adopted by a family from Washington. Because she doesn't live at the Hope orphanage Adrian, Holly, and I drove to her house to visit her and take some pictures. What a beautiful girl. Though she lives with her brothers, and uncle, she is being adopted because she had been caring for her grandmother but then her grandmother died. Sarsina and her relatives live in a house smaller than my kitchen. There is no running water but there is electricity. There was two beds in one part of the house, a few benches, a kerosene burner for boiling water, an injera cooker, and a small tv. Oh yeah, there was a chicken too tied to a chair. We were so struck by this family's maturity, generosity, and love. They made us hot tea and shared their bread with us. Thomas loves soccer, wants to coach, and is studying PE. Adrian and I talked about trying to bring him to the US to go to Mercyhurst. Please pray for him and that this might happen.
Emirates Air. If you're flying to Africa or the Middle East it's a great airline to fly with. Nobody can make 14 hours comfortable but Emirates sure goes out of their way to try.
Holly and Kenneth and Donna and Michael. These are the two other Hope families we got to travel with to pick up our kids. We had the best time with them and now consider them all friends.
Adrian. My husband. It took more than five years of my praying for God to change Adrian's heart for adoption and boy did He. Watching him play with all the children at the orphanage was precious and priceless and now to see how much he loves his son, Rowan, does my heart good, to say the least. It is truly amazing. God is amazing.
Our first week. Not an easy week and not the week I would have chosen. Rowan came home pretty sick. We were concerned and felt lucky to see the pediatrician on Monday. Tuesday was such a bad night for him that we called the doctor again Wednesday and per her suggestion we hospitalized him. It scared me to death and I cried all the way home from the doctor's. They took lots of blood and ran lots of tests and just as expected he tested positive for RSV (Respitory Syncytial Virus). His breathing was so weak they gave him an IV and oxygen treatments. That helped and he only had to stay two nights. He is still pretty sick but not scary sick. Hopefully in the next week or two we'll notice significant improvement. So we've been home almost a week and have barely been home at all. Time is not my own (not that it ever was) and I am still adjusting to have a baby in the house again. I think he will be our baby but he might not be our last. God maybe calling us again. I don't know. I hope if He is that we will be brave enough to do as he asks.
Thank you all for your prayers and I ask that you would continue to remember us as you pray.
Since I wasn't able to write while there I won't be able to recreate our entire trip. I think instead I'll just recall some points that stick out in my mind.
The altitude. I'm a pretty fit person but by the time I climbed three flights of stairs in the hotel my heart felt like it was going to jump out of my chest. Maybe by the last day I was starting to get used to it but the climb still made me breathe hard and my heart pound.
The diesel fumes. Apparently Ethiopia had no emissions regulations and all the cars are diesel and old and the fumes while sitting in traffic were overpowering. They also have very few traffic lights and no seat belt laws. Ethiopian drivers are very proficient at using their horns but not in a rude way. They beep to let you know they aren't stopping so you'd better get out of the way.
The beggars. They weren't necessarily everywhere but they were a lot of places. Begging is illegal in Ethiopia though that didn't stop most people. As we were driving down a busy street (and they were all busy) a boy, about eight to ten years old, was running next to our car against traffic with his hand out. Right before he was about to get smacked by a wing mirror of a passing truck an old man reached out with two hands and grabbed this boy. Then he laid into him apparently telling him off for begging. It's not only illegal but also degrading.
Hope's Place. Hope's Place is the orphanage where Kidus (Rowan) was at. I cried the first time I stepped over the threshold and saw all these beautiful brown faces so eager to be held. I cried when I climbed the steps to the baby room and saw my son for the first time. I recognized him right away. He was being spoon-fed runny rice cereal from a cup. That's my son. He's beautiful and he's mine. My boy. My boy.
Love. Some people question whether they are going to love their adopted child as much as they love their biological children. I'll be honest. I did. I had no idea what to expect but it was love at first sight. Love with a capital L. It was so easy to say "I love you" to him, to snuggle him, to kiss him. I was amazed at the love that poured out of my heart for this little 12-pound baby that I had just set eyes upon. It was overwhelming and wonderful.
Injera. Injera is the main bread they eat in Ethiopia. It is made of Teff flour and is flat and spongy and often sour. They lay a large round piece of injera on your plate and then spoon bits of stew or lentils on top. Ethiopians don't use silverware. Instead they break off a bit of injera and sop it up. I found it delicious and messy. After you eat and before, in fact, someone brings a bowl and pitcher around so you can rinse your hands. Just think, no silverware to wash.
A mother and her two kids. Of all the people I saw in Ethiopia these three stick in my mind. A mother sat on the side of the road with a baby on one leg and what looked like a three-year-old on the other. They just sat there on the sidewalk of this busy road. The fumes were awful and I just thought this is not what a three-year-old should be doing. She should be in preschool or playing with barbies or watching Seseme Street. She probably hadn't eaten anything that day I saw her, nothing that is but diesel fumes. The heartbreak this mother must feel being able to give her children nothing but her lap. Is that good enough?
Ethiopian Christmas. We were so fortunate to be in Ethiopia for their Christmas which they celebrate on January 7. It is not like our Christmas though. It is not commercialized and it is not extended beyond the day. Everyone was back at work or school the next day. Business as usual. Together with the two other Hope families we traveled with we bought a live sheep for the orphanage to have for Christmas. They killed it and we ate sheep and injera, played games, and danced. It was so neat to be able to celebrate Christmas at the orphanage. I don't have the words to explain it. There was so much joy and happiness and absolutely no commercialization. It was how Christmas should be. Plus, it had been Henley's prayer that we would have Rowan for Christmas. We did. God answered her prayer.
Sarsina and her brother Thomas. Sarsina is a 14-year-old girl who is going to be adopted by a family from Washington. Because she doesn't live at the Hope orphanage Adrian, Holly, and I drove to her house to visit her and take some pictures. What a beautiful girl. Though she lives with her brothers, and uncle, she is being adopted because she had been caring for her grandmother but then her grandmother died. Sarsina and her relatives live in a house smaller than my kitchen. There is no running water but there is electricity. There was two beds in one part of the house, a few benches, a kerosene burner for boiling water, an injera cooker, and a small tv. Oh yeah, there was a chicken too tied to a chair. We were so struck by this family's maturity, generosity, and love. They made us hot tea and shared their bread with us. Thomas loves soccer, wants to coach, and is studying PE. Adrian and I talked about trying to bring him to the US to go to Mercyhurst. Please pray for him and that this might happen.
Emirates Air. If you're flying to Africa or the Middle East it's a great airline to fly with. Nobody can make 14 hours comfortable but Emirates sure goes out of their way to try.
Holly and Kenneth and Donna and Michael. These are the two other Hope families we got to travel with to pick up our kids. We had the best time with them and now consider them all friends.
Adrian. My husband. It took more than five years of my praying for God to change Adrian's heart for adoption and boy did He. Watching him play with all the children at the orphanage was precious and priceless and now to see how much he loves his son, Rowan, does my heart good, to say the least. It is truly amazing. God is amazing.
Our first week. Not an easy week and not the week I would have chosen. Rowan came home pretty sick. We were concerned and felt lucky to see the pediatrician on Monday. Tuesday was such a bad night for him that we called the doctor again Wednesday and per her suggestion we hospitalized him. It scared me to death and I cried all the way home from the doctor's. They took lots of blood and ran lots of tests and just as expected he tested positive for RSV (Respitory Syncytial Virus). His breathing was so weak they gave him an IV and oxygen treatments. That helped and he only had to stay two nights. He is still pretty sick but not scary sick. Hopefully in the next week or two we'll notice significant improvement. So we've been home almost a week and have barely been home at all. Time is not my own (not that it ever was) and I am still adjusting to have a baby in the house again. I think he will be our baby but he might not be our last. God maybe calling us again. I don't know. I hope if He is that we will be brave enough to do as he asks.
Thank you all for your prayers and I ask that you would continue to remember us as you pray.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
.JPG)
.JPG)
.JPG)